A few years ago, being twenty-five seemed so old. I used to think that it’s the time when I should stop playing and start focusing on the life ahead of me. I had my life planned out till I’m twenty-five, and now that I am, none of those plans have been realized.
I’m neither a published author nor a young mother. I’m neither an English teacher in Korea nor a successful career woman in any field. I’m an office employee working nights and struggling to sleep during the day. I’m someone who’s just happy to be making ends meet and having time for my dramas and friends. Instead of having a minor heart attack realizing that my life is flashing quickly before my eyes, I am merely nodding along and thinking that life is still good.
The past year has been difficult, but I have to say that this is the happiest I’ve been in years. I am far from what you’d call successful, and I am miles away from achieving my dreams, no matter how little they may be. Yet, I can count my blessings and say that I have more than enough to be grateful. I even wonder if it’s safe to say that I have already defeated the so-called quarter-life crisis.
I am at the point in life where I have learned to stop comparing my minor accomplishments to my counterparts’ major ones. Though some people seem daunting at first, I learn to see them past their accomplishments or their work experience. Like me, they’re also probably at their own crossroads.
Of course, I am far from content with where I am right now. There are more things I want to achieve and more adventures I want to take. But I am still young and my dreams are not going anywhere.
It was silly to expect anything magical to happen on my birthday, because it’s just another ordinary day after all. But I did, and I realized that adulthood is such a funny thing. While younger friends and cousins come to me for advice, my colleagues and closest friends still see me as a little kid who knows no shit.
Age and maturity are subjective. I wouldn’t instantly become a respectable, mature, young woman overnight. And I don’t dream of stripping off of myself the quirks that make me foolish, ridiculous and silly, which in turn makes me me.
I do what most adults do., but I am far from the definition of it. I pay my taxes and worry about my bills. I try to live as independently as possible and balance my salary until the next payday. I follow my wanderlust and pray that my savings would grow somehow. But I am still young and selfish. I still make mistakes, lots of ’em. I still lose sleep over watching too much Korean dramas, and I still crack corny jokes and stupid puns.
I am twenty-five years old, and I am still constantly yearning for my parents’ support and approval. I am twenty-five years old and I still like Roald Dahl and collect children’s books. I am twenty-five years old, and I still think I’m young enough to be whoever I want to be and to do whatever I want do.
Definitely, there are people who win more in life, but I can say that I still manage to get the best out of mine. I often think that I have changed little since I left college. But looking back, I realized how much a shift in perspective have transformed me. There will be days when I could barely keep afloat, but there will also be times when it would feel like I’m on top of the world.
Just five more years and I’ll be turning 30. You may say that I’m thinking far too ahead, but five years can go by so quickly. A lot of things can happen till then, but one thing’s for sure—I’d love to keep the optimism I have today with me for always.
So cheers to growing another year older and hopefully a little bit wiser. Cheers to falling even more in love and cheers to being afraid but doing it anyway. Cheers to making more mistakes and living days I will remember and not regret. Cheers to letting life take over and cheers to learning how to ride the wave.
Because just like how the saying goes, what a crazy great time to be alive.