My eyes welled up and my chest swelled with pride when I saw Alex on stage. I try not to use cliches but I have no idea how else to explain how I felt yesterday. Alex graduated yesterday and I thought I’d end up crying but I thankfully didn’t. I am still a little frustrated with myself for not being able to take better pictures. It was afterall his graduation and I couldn’t even take a good photo. I’m really disappointed with myself.
But this post isn’t about how I fail in photography.
It was incredibly hot and we were all sweaty and yucky. I couldn’t fathom how the graduates felt! it was so hot you’d even sweat by doing nothing. It was a good day nevertheless, and I cannot help but feel happy when I think about it. It was also the first time that I met Alex’s mother. I was so nervous that I got extra hyper before I met her. Heh. But it turned out well that I even got to watch the whole graduation with her! I am not exactly sure how she thinks of me but she made me eat tons of stuff so I’m guessing that she likes me a bit. I am crossing my fingers here.
The three of us even had our picture taken together! His mother and I share the same frustration over Alex’s avoidance of cameras. Seriously. It’s his graduation and he didn’t even want his picture taken. I wish I had Olive’s take his picture! And that’s pretty much my biggest regret yesterday. I understand that he doesn’t think graduation’s a big deal but I think differently, okay. Well, whatever. I’ll just comfort myself by thinking that the important thing is he finally graduated.
That’s our most decent picture together and we both look tired. At least I look happy and I’m looking at the camera. Alex looks bored and as if he wants to go home already. HAHAHA. And again, I shall comfort myself by thinking that at least we have a picture together. I’m just not sure why Alex is always looking at someplace faraway. This is our photo last year during my graduation:
You see what I mean? Why is he always looking to his right? And why do I always look so happy? Anyway, can I just comment how we both changed over the span of a year? Both our skin’s relatively lighter now. Or maybe that’s only the editing. Also, we’re not that afraid to stand closer to each other. Look at that distance!
I got a little sad last night, though. I didn’t get to hug him and I desperately wanted to hug him. I knew no other way to express how happy I am for him. He’d been through quite a lot and it was such a relief to finally see him march. I know that he’s happy even though he acts so nonchalant about the whole ordeal. We didn’t exactly have the chance to hug since he looked tired and pissed after the ceremony. It would be off to just hug him out of nowhere. He was also in a hurry so whatever. I’ll comfort myself by thinking that it’s his loss, not mine. No, I’m not being arrogant, it’s just my way of coping. But not to sound too foolish, he also expressed his regret okay. So it’s not just me!
My only wish is that nothing will change. Friends keep telling me that things will be different once you’re both out of college and already working. But I believe that we can pull off anything. We’ve been through quite a lot though it’s not evident since we rarely fight. So here’s to hoping that nothing will change for the worse. We’ll work through our schedule the way we’ve doing it for the past year. We just need to make a lot effort and put a lot of trust in each other. We can do that. I’m sure we can.